Exploring FOPO

22 June 2022

Tara got curious about a term she heard recently - "FOPO", or "the fear of other people's opinions" so we thought we'd have a chat about it.

Maybe you might find yourself in this topic as much as Bec and Tara did!

Show Notes:

FOPO: Fear of Other People’s Opinions

Why is it a problem?
- It interferes with us being our authentic selves
- Can disguise what our unique talents, values, beliefs are
- Can curb our potential - not willing to take risks or put ourself out there in case it is negatively received

Why does it happen?
- Not a new concept: Roman Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius observed almost 2,000 years ago, “We all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own,” whether they are friends, strangers, or enemies
- Our brains are hardwired to seek connection and approval from others- its what in ancient times kept us as part of a collective, clan or tribe, and that meant safety and security
- The fear of being ridiculed or feeling shame

How can we let go of it:
- Just being aware is a great place to start
- Practice self- acceptance first
- Try to stop judging others
- Ben Crowe suggested creating your own personal philosophy

Quotes:
- Deepak Chopra: “What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life,”
- Anon:“If I wouldn’t invite someone into my house, I shouldn’t let them into my head.”
-Marcus Aurelius: "When men hate or blame you, or say hurtful things about you, look deeply into their hearts and see what kind of men they are. You'll see how unnecessary it is to strain after their good opinion."

Link to The Imperfects

Reference links